tell me that you love me, and it'll be alright

lost. scared. terrified. upset. angry. sad. emotional.
7 words can describe me right now.
i don't know what happened, and i don't know why all the sudden she comes back into his life. especially after what i've gone through to be with him and then finally life gets good and BAM it's bad again. i'm not saying it's bad, because we're still together. as far as i know. that could change at any point in time. because i bet you they're talking right now. and i bet you that he wants to be with her and not me. being a stupid girl, i always assume the worst. i don't know what i'm gonna do. i'm lost. i'm scared. it's like that tunnel i was falling down has turned into spikes at the bottom and i've gotta figure out some way to stay in this. i want him, i want him to be happy, but it's like, what if him being happy hurts me? this is so unfair right now. i wish he would let me in, i wish he would let me help. because i know i could. there's so much i could do to help him. but obviously here's scared, i understand that. i just don't understand what's going to happen to us. because i can not afford to lose him. i wish i could have been there longer, to talk to him more, to hold him more. maybe make things better. but they ended on such a bitter note that i don't know what to do. i told him everything, how i felt about him, EVERYTHING. but it didn't seem to make a difference. i want him to know i'm here. and i always will be.